A tight friend group is a gift if you have it. Being in community with people who become family is special. That friend who knows what you’re thinking even before you realize it, or who you laugh with without words because you have a million insiders.
But what if you don't have that…?
How do you build community?
Community building comes naturally to some. Some folks are leaders in that way, they identify what’s needed and do what they can to create space for others. If you find someone like that, it may be helpful to stay close to those folks. Observe what they do. Notice how they make people feel safe, seen, and included.
If building connection doesn’t come easily for you, start small. Show up for something local: bring your own book- book club, yoga class, free library event. Join a meetup that aligns with your interests or values. Volunteer once a month. Compliment the person you always see at your favorite coffee shop and start a conversation. Building community isn’t a grand gesture; it’s a series of small, intentional, consistent ones that say, “I see you.”
Community is also about letting people show up for you. So many conversations lately have been centered around letting friends support us when we need them and being comfortable asking for...help. We unconsciously (or consciously) put a lot of pressure to get it all done alone. But the proverb, "If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together" resonate deeply because it's true. What does it look like to let folks know when you need support?
Charlotte, in particular, is a city rich with micro-communities. From the creative collectives in Camp North End to the regulars at the Market at 7th Street, to book clubs in Plaza Midwood and yoga sessions in Veterans Park; you can find your people if you’re willing to linger, listen, and invest your time.
Community gives us belonging, accountability, and joy, especially in uncertain times. It reminds us that we’re not meant to do life alone. Whether your circle is three people deep or thirty, whether you meet weekly or just share a text thread that gets you through the week; community keeps us steady when the world around us is constantly shifting.
Were you taught to treat joy like a reward? Something you get after the grind. After the inbox is cleared, after the bills are paid, after you’ve proven your worth ten times over.
The beauty of living in joy, is that it doesn't ask for proof only our intention.
Joy is resistance to the idea that your worth is earned only through exhaustion. That you must hustle to deserve softness. That you have to shrink to be accepted, or that peace is a luxury reserved for later and a chosen few.
Joy is not the opposite of work. It’s the energy that makes work sustainable. It’s the refusal to let cynicism have the final word. It’s the spark that reminds you, you are more than what you produce. Revolutionary, I know. When you pause to savor your coffee, take a walk, laugh loudly, rest fully, create unapologetically, you are affirming yourself in that joy.
And that affirmation ripples because when you live from a place of joy, you give others permission to do the same. You shift the energy in rooms, in homes, in communities. You remind people that joy is not a side effect of living well, it’s the source.
So let this be your gentle call: Reclaim your joy. Not because life is perfect. Not because you’ve earned it. But because it’s your birthright.
Joyness Tip: Finding Community
If you’ve been craving connection but aren’t sure where to start, here are a few Charlotte spaces where joy and belonging meet:
Love Through Lotus Wellness Collective For those ready to pour back into themselves. This collective creates healing-centered spaces through wellness circles, yoga, and holistic workshops. It’s a sanctuary for release and restoration, an active choice in reclaiming your energy.
The Queens Society CLT Looking to make new friends in Charlotte? This one’s for you. The Queens Society gathers women across Charlotte to celebrate connection, creativity, and community.
Charlotte Coffee Club Proof that caffeine can be a conduit for connection. This monthly meetup brings people together over lattes and kindness, while also supporting unhoused neighbors in Charlotte.
Keep Charlotte Beautiful (KCB)This city-wide volunteer initiative rallies neighbors to clean up parks, plant trees, and beautify neighborhoods. If you love rolling up your sleeves, getting your hands dirty while meeting new people, check out this community building group.
Choose one of these this month, or research something you're curious about and show up, even if you’re nervous or don’t know anyone.
Joyness Conversations We're Having
Photo By Sherry Goodloe
Full Name: Sherry Owsley Goodloe
How would you describe yourself (either through occupation or characteristics,etc)?: Retired
Hobbies: Wine and cheese tastings, painting, creating in general, reading
Favorite quote: “What lies behind us, and what lies before us, are but tiny matters to what lies within us.”
What does Joy mean or look like to you?
Assurance that God is always in control and having the confidence that everything is going to be ok. How do you rest?
I read, take naps to refresh or just embrace quietness.
What kind of joy do you use like medicine?
Art has always been a source of medicine for me, as long as I can remember. As a young girl, it brought me joy because it allowed me to express myself freely. As an adult, it helps me combat stress and pain.
S.Goodloe Art at Gallery House
How do you nurture joy when you feel drained or uninspired?
I know I mentioned naps earlier, but when I’m drained, I truly believe that a nap can cure that! As for lack of inspiration, I rarely have that. As a mixed media artist, the field is open. You’ve built connections through teaching, travel, and art. How do you see community showing up in your healing or joy journey?
A great percentage of my connections were built in teaching mixed media art classes throughout Southern California for 25+ years. I’ve been introducing myself and my art publicly here in Charlotte, as I’m pretty new to NC.
Photo by Sherry Goodloe
Where do you go that always brings you back to yourself?
I go home. It’s my private sanctuary, where my personal space and my inner world are intertwined. How do you remind yourself that rest, joy, and creativity aren’t luxuries, they’re necessities? Or do you have to remind yourself of that fact?
Haven’t had the need to remind myself. I know all three quite well. 😉
If you could leave our readers with one message about healing through art and joy, what would it be?
To heal through art and have joy, I prescribe the following: Create art. But beware of the side effects! “Express yourself without using words, reduce anxiety, relieve stress, process trauma, treat depression, inspire feelings of happiness”. Now aren’t those the best “side effects” for a prescription you’ve ever read?
Sherry Owsley Goodloe is an Ambivert, World Traveler, Christian, multi-passionate creative and Breast Cancer Survivor. Her mixed media artwork is currently on display at The Gallery House
Joyness Standouts
November in Charlotte
These local November events are perfect for joy filled moments:
BHM Fall Health Summit & Expo (Nov 15) Free Health screenings, expert panels, fitness sessions at Friendship Missionary Baptist Church, 3400 Beatties Ford Rd
Yap Ye Iswa Festival (Nov 22) Free public celebration of Indigenous culture at the Catawba Cultural Center, drumming, dancing, demonstrations, Indigenous vendors.
Snow Days: Winter Experience (Nov 22) Walk into a glowing indoor winter wonderland featuring an aurora-borealis scene, “sock skating” rink, igloo experience, cozy hygge nook and more.
UCity Lights Winter Celebration (Nov 22) Free, family-friendly: Santa & Mrs. Claus, ornament‐making, hot cocoa, ride the Polar Express, tree lighting at 7:00 PM.
